Still In Hell
by N. H. Moonshadow
Summary: The truth about those left behind in the Cage.
1. Chapter 1

**Still In Hell**

As time dragged on, he lost a lot of his coherency, most of the details all blurring together.

Heat. Pain. Screaming.

His entire world had narrowed down to those three things. At least one was always present, and sometimes all three at once, but when that happened there was always the possibility of a blackout. There were times the pain was worth the respite.

There were moments where the screaming was so loud it was deafening, and he couldn't tell if it was himself or Sam making the awful racket. He was sure there was a time, more than once, where it was both of them at the same time.

The noise all became the same after a while and it became hard to separate. There was little point in putting in the effort anyway.

There was light too, blinding in its intensity, and coming from two separate sources. One only came close when he was sure that Sam was the one screaming, and as it retreated Sam would fall into silence and then it would be Adam's turn again. The other light was always close. It was angry and familiar, and it terrified him like nothing else did.

Then a Darkness came. Only once, and briefly, but Adam remembers.

It was hard to forget such an abrupt change in the routine, especially after the change it left in its wake.

A third voice made itself known that day, deep panicked bellows that begged and pleaded and threatened before falling silent.

Adam never heard Sam's voice again.

The light that held him, that burned and tore at the very fabric of himself, had hit some sort of breaking point. It lavished extra attention on him after the Darkness left, filled with fury and wrath and unleashing it on the only available victim.

It wasn't long after that when the two lights collided, leaving Adam to huddle alone in the corner and hope to be forgotten.

There was a flash and a sound like a bomb going off, sharp, loud, and shaking him to the core. Then a dimness.

One of the lights had been snuffed out.

The light that remained came to him, just as Adam knew it would. He knew better that to run or to fight, and he braced himself for the heat and the pain.

He was met instead with a blanket of cold, and a voice in his ear, the same one that had bellowed loud and long when Sam disappeared. The cold seeped slowly into his flesh, soothing the pain to a pleasant numbness, the light tucking Adam tighter to it.

It whispered to him, saying the same thing over and over, until Adam was unsure who it was talking to.

"He made me promise. He left, but he made me promise."


	2. Chapter 2

Adam had lived an eternity within the confines of the Cage.

Things were . . . _better_ than they had been in the beginning. Not good, but certainly better. He was fully aware, for one, and he knew who he was. He knew who he was with.

How he got here.

It had taken over a century for Lucifer to put Adam back together, and almost two to soothe away the nightmares of screaming and charred flesh. He could think back on that horrible time now. He could think about before Sam was twice taken away, body then soul, and before Lucifer had put an end to Michael, all without drowning in panic. The memories were still raw and horrible, of course they were, but they no longer consumed him when his thoughts drifted to them. If his mind drifted a little too far it didn't take much for Lucifer to bring him back. A cool touch and a soft voice would usually do the trick.

Lucifer was kinder than Michael had ever been, and sometimes Adam wanted to cry at the irony.

When his memories began to return in a more coherent fashion, he remembered his resurrection, his deal with Heaven, his _brothers_. Anger had sparked within him. Hot. Furious. He wanted so desperately to hate the Winchesters, Dean for saying No, Sam for saying Yes, both for forcing heaven's hand and dragging him into the middle of it. For abandoning him after all they spouted about Family.

Lucifer didn't give him a chance to nurture that hatred. Cocooned within the Devil's icy wings, Lucifer would pull him close and whisper stories into his ear.

It was hard to hate the Winchester's once you knew them, and Lucifer made sure that he knew his brothers very well. He told Adam their story in it's entirety, from Mary Winchester's deal with Azazel to the plans that Heaven and Hell had laid out for them. Lucifer went into great detail, about the impossible odds stacked against them, and their loyalty to family. Their faults and flaws, and the quirks that composed them as a whole. He told him of the grisly way they had found out about Adam, body already cold and decaying, with the ghoul that killed him still wearing his face. He told how they fought to reach him before Michael got to him. How devastated they were when they couldn't.

The stories would sometime invoke a more recent memory, half hazy but real, of Sam drawing attention to himself, granting Adam a reprieve from Michael. Sam's screams had been the loudest then.

Sam.

 _He made me promise_ , Lucifer had said, unsteady and near hysterical in the wake of killing Michael. _He left, but he made me promise._

Adam knew what that meant now. Sam's soul had been dragged away by Death himself, but not before he had made the Archangel promise to protect Adam as much as he had attempted to protect Sam.

Now there was something broken in Lucifer.

Granted, the original fractures had probably been there for millennia. Born during his rebellion, the resulting cracks spreading over time, growing as extensive and intricate as spider webbing. He was sure they got worse when Sam had grabbed all of them and tumbled them all in the cage.

Adam was certain that Lucifer had shattered the moment Sam had been stolen away. Keeping Adam grounded, healing him, had been the only thing keeping all those pieces from disappearing altogether.

Now that Adam was more or less whole and coherent he could see the Archangel more clearly, could see all the broken pieces and the coping mechanisms that he was using to keep himself there with Adam. He helped how and when he could, and found that the best thing was to get Lucifer to talk. Better still was when Adam could actually contribute and respond in kind.

Adam often wondered when Lucifer last had someone truly listen to him.

Lucifer worried about Sam often.

Adam and Lucifer have spent an eternity together but in the world above it has only been a matter of years. Adam has had time and the personal attention of an Archangel to aid his recovery. To keep him sane.

Sam didn't have that, and Lucifer worried.

His biggest fear, Adam learned, was Sam not remembering him. The _real_ him.

Michael had favored mind tricks with Sam. He would twist and torture and burn, all the while wearing Lucifer's face. Whenever Lucifer managed to steal Sam back, his brother had screamed and fought and Lucifer had to convince him over and over what was real.

No one in the Cage had been safe from Michael.

In retrospect it had been a miracle that Sam had been taken from them during one of his clearer moments. Sam would never had begged for Adam's protection otherwise.

Adam wished he could thank him.

Instead, he tried his best to be the glue that Lucifer needed, to hold all his broken pieces together when Lucifer was unable to do it himself.

It was another eternity that passed before their whole world changed.

The eternally static and rigid walls of the Cage shifted. They didn't break, but they warped and stretched, and suddenly Lucifer was in a panic. He was clutching madly at Adam and chanting _no no no_ and _please don't make me_ over and over.

It was then, as Adam felt himself slipping from the Archangel's grasp, that he realized what was happening.

And he knew what it was that Lucifer couldn't ask.

"Yes!" Adam shouted. "Don't you dare leave me behind! The answer is yes!"

The light of Lucifer's being ignited like a solar flare, and Adam was swallowed whole, was housing a _whole star_.

When the summoning finished, they were still in a cage, still in Hell. But it was so very different. This cage was made of wards and dark magic, and was surrounded by holy fire.

 _This won't hold us_ , Lucifer assured him, as he rolled their neck, adjusting and settling himself more firmly in Adam's body.

He lifted their gaze to finally acknowledging the three standing beyond the wards, but all his attention fell only to one.

Sam.

 **Author's Note** : Well. So much for this being a one shot. (Throws hands in the air)- Shadow


	3. Chapter 3

Adam studied Sam, carefully taking in the details of his face and his stance. He knew Lucifer was doing the same, but his scrutiny ran much deeper since he was capable of seeing so much more.

His brother looked older, which was to be expected, but he also looked so fucking _exhausted_. Thick cords of tension made up his body. They were there on his face and in his posture. He was too rigid, limbs stiff and his knuckles bone white. The long lines of him were strung tighter than a bow string, as if he was one heartbeat away from either running or launching himself into a fight.

 _Dean's not here_ , Lucifer pointed out, somewhat slowly. _That . . . worries me._

It worried Adam too, now that it was brought to his attention.

"Michael," Sam said, breathless. There was fear there, but a lot of confusion too.

Lucifer flinched at that, and Adam soothed him as best he could.

After all, Sam had no way of knowing.

The well-dressed demon turned to the red-headed woman and scowled. "Mother," he hissed lowly, "You summoned the wrong archangel!"

"I'm not Michael," Adam found himself saying, slightly surprised he still had access to his own voice. Lucifer still had control of his body though. As Adam spoke for them both, Lucifer moved them to the front of this new cage, limbs loose and relaxed as he leaned a forearm against the bars. "Michael's dead."

"Adam?" God, Sam looked like he was afraid to even _hope_. "How . . . what do you mean _Michael's dead_?"

Lucifer shrugged their shoulders. Adam could feel him stretching his wings, pushing them against the cage to test their integrity. They gave, so very slightly. Lucifer eased up and Adam could feel his smugness.

"Lucifer killed him," Adam answered, carefully keeping his voice neutral. With a mental nudge to Lucifer, they made a show of peering through the bars to look around pointedly. "Where's Dean?"

"Working," Sam said slowly. His eyes were assessing now, teetering on suspicious. "You're surprisingly . . . collected. Especially after-" He gestures vaguely at their surroundings.

"How long has it been?" Adam asked, genuinely curious.

"Seven years."

"Oh." Adam had been aware that it had been centuries, but the number was still staggering when he mentally calculated the time discrepancy. That was over _eight hundred years_ in Hell.

 _He knows_ , Lucifer whispered, both exasperated and fond. _Or at least he suspects. Sam always was the more observant of your siblings._

"-don't _shush_ me, Fergus!" The red-head was seething and pointing a well-manicured nail at the demon's nose. "I kept my end of the bargain! I told you! There was. No. _Mistake!_ "

"Interesting company you're keeping these days, Sam." That was primarily Lucifer, but Adam would admit to thinking something along the same lines. A witch and a demon was not the kind of company he expected from his brothers. Then again, Lucifer had killed two of their closest allies before all of them fell into the pit, so who knew what circumstances led to this little gathering.

"Yeah, well, we're desperate, and what we're facing is affecting everyone." Sam's expression hardened. "You can drop the act, Lucifer. Illusions like that aren't going to work."

 _What did I tell you?_ Lucifer said proudly. He applauded Sam, and grinned.

 _Yeah, but here's the hard part_. Adam prodded Lucifer, quietly asking for more control and the archangel accommodated without a word. "Got it half right," Adam told his brother, Lucifer's grin fading into a half-smile. "Luce is here, but I'm not an illusion. It really is good to see you Sam. We were worried."

Sam swallowed and gave a half shake of his head, caught somewhere between denial and disbelief.

"Well, whoever you are, let's get down to business, shall we?" The demon in the expensive suit sauntered up next to Sam. The hunter shot him an annoyed frown, which he blatantly ignored. "You are here on _our_ invite after all."

Lucifer bristled. "You're overstepping your bounds Crowley."

The demon had the audacity to look bored. "Am I?"

"Crowley," Sam warned, hand out and voice low. He turned back to them, "We do need your help."

"And if you're not willing to play ball, then it's back in the box with you."

" _Crowley_."

Lucifer took full control at that, the threat to them, to _Adam_ , was too much for him to ignore. Adam felt his wings mantel in an aggressive display, grace crackling against the bars. "I would love to see you try, _salesman_. I promise that it won't end well for you."

"I'm the King of Hell, darling. I can do whatever I like."

 _Lucifer, calm down, you're scaring Sam._

Their attention refocused on Sam, who was staunchly holding his ground, but his breathing was heavy, and there was a fine tremor running through his limbs. Lucifer instantly relaxed, his posture deliberately softening. "What can I do for you Sam?"

"The Darkness. Can you beat her?"

Adam had never felt true fear from Lucifer before, but he was experiencing it now. When he responded to Sam his tone was carefully neutral. "Aunt Amara is on the loose?"

A single firm nod.

Adam felt the cool chill of Lucifer's grace tighten around him, not suppressing, but wrapping around him like he could hide him from the world. Adam didn't fight it, but he did meet the embrace with a gentle push, asking for attention. _Lucifer, talk to me._

"Who had the mark? Did Cain still have it?" There was an urgent undertone there, barely detectable, but it made Adam take notice. When no one answered him, Lucifer pressed harder. "Sam. Who. Had. _The mark?_ "

"Dean did," Sam finally answered, face scrunching slightly.

 _Adam, your brothers have a spectacular talent for finding the worst trouble imaginable._

Adam tried to lighten the mood. _What are we looking at on the Richter Scale?_

 _Forget Richter Scale. More like a black hole of the supermassive variety._

"Sam," Lucifer drew the name out slowly. "Do you know where your brother is right now?"

Sam's silence was answer enough.

 _That's it. We're getting out of here._

With a flap of his wings and a sharp burst of his grace, the holy fire was snuffed out and their cage crumbled to pieces around them. In a blink they were in front of a terrified Sam.

Adam tried to give his brother a reassuring smile as Lucifer took his hand and flew the three of them out of Hell.


	4. Chapter 4

_What the Hell is that?_ Adam asked as soon as they landed.

Adam felt Lucifer's unease, though it was clear that the angel was trying to hide it. _It seems our siblings are competing in The Who-can-be-more-stupid Contest. Seems like those morons tried to smite Aunt Amara._

Sam pulled away abruptly, and Lucifer made no move to stop him. It wasn't until then that Adam noticed the familiar black car pulled onto the side of the road. Sam crouched down beside the car where Dean sat, sweating and groggy but otherwise unharmed.

 _Smiting sickness_ , Lucifer informed Adam. _He'll be fine as long as he doesn't get any closer to ground zero._

"Dean! Are you okay?"

"Peachy." Adam's oldest brother spit and then sat back against his car. "Did Cas get ahold of you? I tried calling you, but I couldn't get through."

 _Castiel?_ The name echoed between Adam and Lucifer, but neither had answers for the other.

Sam looked around briefly. "Where is Cas?"

Dean thumped his head lightly against his car. "You just missed him. He ran off to see if Amara's really dead."

"What? Alone?!"

The comforting chill of Lucifer's grace fluxed and expanded.

 _What are you doing?_ Adam asked.

 _Trying to find my brother. Ask yours how he's still alive._

 _Considering you're the one who killed him, that might not be the best thing to ask._

Lucifer murmured a reluctant agreement, and approached Sam and Dean. Adam was a bit unsure of their welcome but he was still so very glad to see them. Sam caught the motion and lifted a hand in warning. "Don't!"

Lucifer raised Adam's hand's, trying to go for harmless and placating. "Easy there Sam. I wouldn't bring us here just to hurt Dean. Or you, for that matter."

Sam pursed his lips but said nothing. Dean turned his head and squinted up at them. His face immediately crumpled. "Adam?" He croaked.

 _There's the Winchester guilt again,_ Lucifer noted.

Adam nudged at Lucifer's control. _Move over Luce. Let me handle this_. When the Archangel complied Adam crouched down so he could look both of his brothers in the eye. He smiled, knowing it looked a little sad, but it was an honest one. "Hey Dean. Heard you and Sam have been busy."

Dean made a strangled noise in his throat. "There's no way you . . . you can't be- Sammy?" He had turned to look at Sam to see his expression was hard and closed off.

"Stop playing with us," Sam ground out.

"I'm not," Adam insisted. " _We're_ not."

Dean's expression hardened as well. "Michael?"

"No," Sam grimaced, his knuckles turning white on Dean's jacket. "It's Lucifer."

Dean looked caught between drawing a weapon and being violently ill.

"You asked for help. So here we are," Adam said firmly. Seeing that both his brothers were still tense, he plopped himself down on the pavement, and made an attempt at lightening the mood. "Amara must be pretty big fish to have Luce so worked up. You know, I didn't know angels could have aunts until today?"

"Why should we believe anything you have to say?" That was Dean.

"Trust would be nice, but it's not a requirement." Adam met Dean's fire with calm. "By the way, Luce mentioned something called smiting sickness. You'll be fine as long as you avoid where the smiting actually happened."

Sam looked ready to speak, but Dean patted his arm and beat him to it. "Cas told me the same thing. So that checks out at least."

Lucifer tugged at Adam's attention _. I found Castiel. He's not far._

Adam could feel the stifled wave of fear. _But?_

 _Amara it there and very much alive._

"Okay," Adam said aloud, running a hand through his hair. Then he turned to his brothers. "Shit. Okay. Sam, take Dean and go. We're going to go fetch Castiel before he gets himself killed for good."

Sam's face scrunched up, like he heard the words, but he couldn't decipher their meaning.

Adam stood, and then offered up control back to Lucifer. His soul sank into Lucifer's grace, acknowledging his fear and offering what comfort he could. _Ready?_

 _No_ , he admitted, even as he spread his wings. _But here we go._

From one blink to the next, they were in The edges of a forest.

There before them was Castiel and a woman in a black dress. They were circling each other around the body of a dead woman, neither taking note of the new arrival.

Which was very good because Lucifer was assessing the situation and Adam needed a moment.

Because it was then that Adam realized his long exposure to Lucifer's grace might have left a few lingering side effects. Adam was having a bizarre sort of double vision. He could see the bodies moving before him, but he could also see that they were _more_.

There was shining Castiel, a mere ember glow compared to Lucifer's brilliance, but still impressive even with his battered grace and shredded wings. Adam hoped Lucifer wasn't wholly responsible for that.

And then there was a woman who was a terrifying contradiction of vastness and void.

Amara.

 _The Darkness to my Father's Light_ , Lucifer told him.

Castiel stood firm against one the most powerful beings existence and held his ground. "You think I'm afraid to die?"

The woman, Amara, seemed mildly amused. "I know you are. You reek of fear and self loathing."

"Of course he does," Lucifer scoffed, effectively drawing all eyes to him. "He's a damn _Winchester_."


End file.
